Rooftops…

..are AWESOME! Today, we got invited to the apartment by one of the intern girls Jess is working with. Her apartment is in a building right at Central Park West and from up at the rooftop you can see over Central Park and the Skyline around it. A.M.A.Z.I.N.G!!! This is the kind of building, you end up in and know that you made it in life. If I lived in that apartment, I would go to this roof every single day:

In the morning, I skyped with my Mom, who had her 45th birthday today. Hence, the whole family was there standing around the laptop screen, even the members that you only see once or twice a year for the important celebrations or when the cake is expected to be especially good. It’s really great seeing everyone but on the other hand, it also made me notice how much I am living in a different world right now. This big city, this different country, the people here, the lifestyle…all of these things are something I can absolutely connect to. But it’s the complete contrast to what I came from. And I can see that in their faces whenever I start talking about my adventures in New York and how much I want to move here for good at some point. This facial expression saying “Oh, thats nice dear, its a nice adventure and have a great time, enjoy every second but don’t put up your hoped to high.” And its not that they wouldn’t support me. Its just the generation and the time they grew up in, this mindset that makes it impossible to imagine family emigrating to the US. It makes me worried that I am distancing myself from then without even noticing. So, that was one thing I realized today while smiling and nodding and telling funny stories about my everyday adventures here. The other thing I noticed was how old my grandparents turned. I do make sure that I see them twice a year and more often if possible. And of course I know that all of this is absolutely natural and just the normal circle of life blablabla but it just rubs it in painfully that your childhood is over and the people that belonged to it, the people that took you into the woods to search for mushrooms or taught you how to ride a motorbike or pretended not to hear anything when you sneaked downstairs at night to steal some candy, these awesome people start fading and, at some point, will be gone and you have nothing but your memories. The summers that my cousin, my brothers and I spent at their house, in the countryside with nothing but trees, fields and a lake, these summers were great.
SO, I think I finally found one downturn of living here at the moment: There is no open space to just walk and get everything off your mind. You couldn’t walk barefoot or just stand at a shore letting the wind blow through your hair and shake your thoughts back into place. The parks are closed after 10 and dangerous to be after sunset anyways. Hence, you have a blog to not only look cool and up-to-date but also to be able to have some sort of diary to get things off your head. Jupp. And since you are in the States and NOT 21 yet, you can’t even go out and dance your melancholy away…

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